This Crazy Life

She’s discharging from PHP this Friday.  Now don’t get excited.  She’s discharging because they don’t think they can help her.  They think she’ll end up in the hospital soon and eventually back in residential.  They actually want me to put her on lists for residential, even though they are done with her.  I’m sorry that is not your decision to even help me make any longer.  And they aren’t even recommending their residential.  They are done with her and want her gone.  Not the exact words they used, but how it felt and pretty close.  They said she’s the most severe patient they’ve had and if I find something that works in the future if I would let them know just in case, they ever have another kid like her.  I asked if they would recommend coming back to their PHP in the future if we do residential and then come back closer to home for PHP.  I got a quick no from one.  Followed by a well maybe from another it would just really depend on if she was any better.  So basically, another facility that is done with her even though she’s not any better and insurance is not pushing for this at all.  But then they want to tell me what I should do after discharge.  Nope, sorry, you left us, I don’t even want to listen to you now.  I don’t think it’s horrible to take a break.  She’s been in solid treatment for 6 months now.  She has not made any progress towards recovery.  Even what she’s eating is limited and has been this entire time.  She needs a break.  I need a break.  Our family needs a break.  Will she go back to residential eventually?  Probably.  Am I putting her on lists now?  No.  I plan to let her stay home hopefully find something to live for other than her ED.  And if we need stabilization we can go to the hospital for a few days.  I don’t understand why this is such an awful idea.  Why can’t she just be home for a while.  Sending her away isn’t working.  So why are we going to keep repeating the same thing that is getting us nowhere.