This Crazy Life

She’s (I started by saying we, it feels like I’m right there with her, but I am not) been on the same meds since early January.  We’ve increased dosages but haven’t played with anything else since April.  100mg of Zoloft.  25 mg of Hydroxyzine 3 times a day.  5 mg of Zyprexa.  It’s obviously not working.  I finally have ERC realizing it’s not working.  They’ve gotten her stay extended and we’re going to swap the Zyprexa for Risperdal.  It’s supposed to be a stronger anti-psychotic and better at turning the volume down on the eating disorder thoughts and is supposed to help with the OCD thoughts better as well.  I really hope this helps.  I definitely feel like I’m grasping at last chances, but eventually something will click.  When she tells you that her eating disorder and her are stronger than anyone on her team and they will not be beat it’s pretty upsetting.  Especially when we’re about to step down a level of care because “on paper she looks good”.  So, another day another dollar.  They are starting off on a low dose so I’m sure we’ll have to increase it as well.  Only extending my time in Dallas.  But I would prefer to leave her in a higher level of care for as long as possible instead of going home and going back to the hospital.