This Crazy Life

This blog is all over the place anymore.  It’s kind of like a therapy journal for me at this point.  I’m currently at a work conference.  One I willingly signed up for. And you know how that goes when you’re a total introvert.  You do something you wish you could do and think you should do and then when it gets down to it you totally regret all your life decisions.  Yep, that’s me right now.  I’m trying so hard this year to accomplish and reach for big goals and dreams I have for myself.  And this is part of it.  But when you’re shy and reserved how do you do it?  Tonight was a happy hour.  I literally had myself feeling sick before I went.  But I got up, got dressed, and went.  And there was no parking.  So I left.  I pulled into a nearby parking lot.  I told myself I could do it.  I went back.  Still no parking.  So I decided I would go get some food and try again.  And still no parking.  I did see parking across the street this time that some people were using.  But at this point I couldn’t do it.  I’m planning on doing all the activities tomorrow.  But man.  I really wanted to go.  But then knowing I was going to walk into a restaurant full of strangers, not knowing anyone.  It was just too much.  I even had my exit strategy planned.  I was going to get my registration information and go to the bathroom.  Sit in the bathroom for 15ish minutes.  And leave.  I was there.  But we didn’t even get that far.  Maybe tomorrow!